Awareness and Perception

The 'me time' has been consumed by 'work time' this week, despite my best efforts. I did make it to see Ani DiFranco in concert (2nd row seats) but spent far too much time responding to work e-mails on my blackberry . I let a unique experience slip into the background to deal with issues that probably could have waited. And at the end, I realized this and really focused in and was amazed by her talent, passion, and ability to translate experiences into music. It was a set-back, but I am on track again now.

Speaking of getting on the right track- so Ms. Tirzah- you are diving into on-line dating? I completely relate to your assessment as to accepting this as a non-freak thing to do. A psychologist should do a study of the stages towards acceptance of this new means of meeting a mate. The vast majority of our time is spent communicating remotely rather than personally so on-line dating as an extension of that norm has certainly become more natural despite our urges to deny this.

While I have many experiences I could share here and insights, there is one in particular I think it would have helped me to have known when I was diving in. While much of online dating is 'different' to 'real world dating', perhaps the most profound yet intangible shift to me was that the tone of the meeting has already been set. The 'I just met a great guy but don't think I'd like to date him but do want to be friends' transition is more difficult to achieve because there is a presumption that you are in it for romance (or something kind of like it... hm... hm).

I was left wanting to create a service that connected people to new friends with no expectation of romance. Not a meetup.com group, but a friend match-up that is more personal and allows screening. Because at the end of the day, when I was gravitating toward online dating, it really was because I had a lack of single friends in my life who inspired me to leave my house and seize the city. There are times that I want to explore new things, be it exercise, travel, book clubs, cooking, etc. Some of these fit my current friends' interests and availability while others do not. I'd love to be able to interview new friends in the same way we interview these on-line dates. Hey, if the greek system works, why not this?

Enjoy the experience. Be open to it. And most importantly, don't let yourself ask 'I wonder what is wrong with him that he is online'...